How Temperature Play Can Keep Things Hot
What is temperature play?
No matter what the weather is like outside, temperature play is an exciting activity to add to your repertoire of pleasure preferences all year round. Temperature play is a type of sensation play that involves using hot and cold objects or substances, such as ice cubes or warm oils, to create contrasting sensations on the skin. The primary objective is to explore and enhance sensory experiences, often leading to increased intimacy and connection between partners. This form of play can be customized to suit individual preferences and comfort levels.
Why are people into temperature play?
There are many reasons why individuals love to indulge in temperature play. While it is often associated with BDSM or kink scenarios, enhancing power dynamics during a Dom/sub scene, it doesn't have to be. It can simply be part of an erotic exploration with a partner, focusing on sensuality rather than role-playing. For example, using a heated vibrator can improve blood flow and enhance the possibility of orgasm. The same goes for warming lubricants, which can warm up your genital area, getting you into the mood faster and enhancing your pleasure. This makes temperature play a highly erotic experience that can be enjoyed in both vanilla and kink contexts.
This practice engages thermoreceptors, specialized sensory nerve cells that detect temperature changes, sending signals to the brain to create sensations of warmth and coolness. These temperature shifts can also stimulate the release of endorphins, natural mood enhancers, leading to feelings of euphoria and heightened pleasure. In other words, it feels good.
Safety first
As with any sexual encounter, consent is paramount. Establishing a safeword is also a good practice. This is because although it feels good, there could be moments when it pushes your boundaries of pleasure, especially if it’s too hot or too cold. A safeword can be used to indicate when you are approaching your limit or have reached it. A common system is "red" to stop and "amber" to signal that you are close to your limit. Feel free to be more creative with your safewords if you prefer.
When considering risks and precautions, it’s advised not to be too extreme with temperature play. You don’t want to burn your partner with excessive heat, nor do you want to cause discomfort with something too cold. Always test the temperature on yourself first to ensure it's safe before applying it to your partner.
Location, location, location
Location is everything. In temperature play, it's crucial to avoid sensitive areas of the body to prevent injury or discomfort. These include the eyes, ears, mouth, throat, genitalia, anus, skin with cuts or abrasions, and areas with very thin skin such as the inner part of the elbow or the back of the knee, which can be more sensitive to temperature extremes. Start with mild temperatures to ensure a safe and enjoyable experience and then build it up. Now that we've covered safety, let's move on to the fun part!
Temperature Tips & Tricks
One of my best tips for temperature play is to combine it with a blindfold. This enhances the elements of surprise and surrender for the recipient. Moreover, it can heighten the feeling of power in the one applying the temperature sensations. Whether it is part of a BDSM scenario or not, you'll gain a greater sense of control because your partner won’t know which part of their body will receive the stimulation, what type of sensation it will be, or whether it will be hot or cold. This can be incredibly arousing as you observe their reactions.
It’s getting hot in here
Imagine dripping hot wax on someone’s back and witnessing that beautiful moment when it hits their skin, causing them to sigh and flinch. It's delicious. If you enjoy wax play, remember that candle wax can be quite hot. The greater the distance from the body when dripping the wax, the less intense the impact will be. Be very careful not to burn your partner. Massage candles are a much better, safer and more versatile option. The burning temperature is lower than a traditional wax candle. In addition, they tend to liquefy quicker, and the wax becomes massage oil, allowing you to turn a temperature play session into a massage session. Many massage candles have ingredients that are suitable for the skin, providing a very sensual experience. Always blow the candle out before you start dripping the wax to ensure safety.
Cold play
If you prefer cold play, I don’t mean the music band, then putting a glass or metal dildo in the refrigerator before exploring different parts of the body can be a highly sensual experience. Glass is an incredible material for temperature play, as is metal. Metal can sometimes be very cold without having to put it in water at all. Dildos are not just for internal stimulation; they are also wonderful for massage and tickling. You can trace their arms, back, torso and legs and perform a thorough erogenous exploration of their body. For erotic tickling, focus on areas such as the armpits, waist and the soles of the feet.
if you are feeling a little bit cruel, in the nicest possible way, you could circle the nipples with the cold tip of the dildo and watch their reaction. You can also explore other parts of the body, such as the inner thighs, legs, and the soles of the feet. If you want to include feet, remember that some people are very sensitive about their feet being touched or stimulated, whereas, for others, it's a big area of pleasure and the focus of many fetish delights. If you want to be extra playful, something like putting an object between the toes can be incredibly fun. Just remember to grab the ankle so they don't inadvertently kick you due to the tickling reflex.
Ice, Ice, Baby
Using an ice cube can be a simple yet effective way to indulge in temperature play. Start with gentle touches to warm up your partner, then gradually introduce the ice cube by running it along their body. The sensation of it slowly melting on your partner's bare skin can be highly erotic, especially when the dripping water is licked with a warm tongue and mouth. Focus on erogenous zones like the inner thighs, nipples, and neck. If you are into nipple sensation play, the combination of nipple clamps with hot or cold temperatures can be mind-blowing.
For an unforgettable experience, hold the ice cube in your mouth while performing oral sex, combining the cold sensation with your warm breath. Alternating between using the ice cube and your warm mouth can certainly make it more pleasurable and stimulating.
Hot and Cold Confusion
The elements of surprise and power play a significant role in temperature play. To enhance this, you can introduce an element of confusion by alternating temperatures. For instance, when your partner gets accustomed to one temperature, surprise them with the opposite sensation.
Take an ice cube, for example. You could have a warm cup of tea nearby and take a sip to provide a contrasting warm sensation. Another idea is to use a glass dildo, preferably a double-ended one. Prepare two cups of water—one with lukewarm water and the other with cold water. Alternate dipping different ends of the dildo into the varying temperatures, then trace it over your partner's body. This combination of temperatures can create a thrilling and unpredictable experience.
By blending hot and cold sensations, you can create a dynamic interplay that heightens pleasure, deepens intimacy, and fosters a sense of connection and trust. Remember, the key to a successful and enjoyable temperature play session lies in communication, consent, and safety. Whether you're exploring with a blindfold, experimenting with wax, using an ice cube during oral sex, or all of the above, the possibilities are endless. So, embrace the exciting world of temperature play and discover how it can keep the spark alive, no matter the season.
Venus O’Hara is a holistic self-love content creator specializing in sex toys and female pleasure. She has tested over 800 pleasure products and designed dozens. She shares her sex tips on her YouTube channel and her podcast The Orgasmic Lifestyle as well her short erotic stories on her website https://venusohara.org/ Her mission is to raise orgasmic awareness and her work has been featured in The Guardian, GQ, Playboy, BBC Three, The Daily Mail and more. Follow her on Instagram and Twitter.
